Happy Horny New Year

Yeah yeah yeah, I know I'm a little late on this one but oh well it happens. I just wanted to stop in and make sure that I got to wish everyone a happy new year and that this year goes better for everyone! I know for me it will, without a doubt. Why you ask? Well turns out I have a simple solution for this one. I turn 21 on the 14th! Now I know everyone makes big deals about this day, and guess what! SO DO I!!!!!!! I am stoked! I have waited a long time for this one, so I'm gonna make sure that I do it right. I will make sure to have tons of fun for everyone too!

So this year I have decided that I am gonna do some things a little bit different than my normal. For one I am just gonna go out and have fun. Not try to find a girlfriend, now if one were to just happen along then that would be awesome! But in the mean time I am totally content with the single life. Another thing that I plan to do differently would to be start working on my dream. Which if your wondering does happen to be acting. Now hold on before your start saying really? you and a million other people. Well this I know but instead of sitting around dreaming about it, I am gonna actually find ways to start making it happen! For example I have already written out my goals and plan of action sheet on how to accomplish this (which by the way I have never actually done before). I plan on starting to take some acting classes to help better my skills, I have decided that I need to look at this as a career instead of a dream. The best way to start that in my mind is to constantly work on becoming better! Instead of just hoping that one day I might get discovered by some stroke of luck, considering the fact that nothing ever works like that. And the 3rd and final thing I am changing about this year is that I am gonna start working out again. I haven't worked out in a while now and I am starting to wish that I just hadn't stopped, so come Monday I am gonna start working out!

I hope that everyone has a wonderful 2011, I know I sure will and as well a safe one too. Happy New Year. Horny Moose out!

Christmas

I'd like to start by wishing anyone and everyone a merry and wonderful Christmas. If there is one day that I never wish someone to have a bad day for it would be today. I hope everyone gets what or who they wanted and that they get to spend it with their loved ones. Now I have never known the feeling of not being with my loved ones for Christmas, however I got to experience it this year. Today didn't even feel like Christmas to me. Just another saturday night that I am working a midshift for.

I got some wonderful gift cards for Christmas this year sent to me by family. As well as some wonderful baked goods from my mom. I asked for a lot and truly expected nothing so i definitely got more than I had ever hoped. But the one thing that my heart desired was not achieved. I was hoping to have a special someone to spend the small amount of the day that I was off with. Now hopefully one day I'll find it, who knows. But I have learned the true understanding of don't take for granted what you have while you have it. However I have been able to spend it with some friends that I have made since being in the Navy but let me tell you that it's just no where near the same! And please don't get me wrong, i am not at all ungrateful for anything I have or the people I have been around as they are all some amazing people. But I just wish i could of been at home in Denver or even St. Louis or San Diego with the rest of my family instead of working for Christmas night.

Now on to a happier note, I have gotten an amazing Christmas present from God himself this year. It is snowing, right when I needed it most. Feeling as homesick as I was it started snowing on Christmas the first time there has been snow on the ground during Christmas day since 1966. A more than amazing feeling being from CO knowing that I get to see at least a couple hours of white Christmas in 2 years, and it just happened to be when I need it most.

So on that note I'll leave y'all be. I hope everyone had an emaculate Christmas and that you got to spend time with your loved ones. Enjoy and savour that time as it can be swiped from you even quicker than it came!

3 Some?

So recently i got arrested and wondered what was gonna happen with this girl that I have actually decided to like and then my phone fucks up to the point of no return unfortunately...welll I ended up gettin drunk one night start the middle of a threesome. The one thing that many people would love to be involved in.

Well this one tended to be my idea one to help out a friend and two to say i have done it. So when this thing was going down about half way through, and you know what not even that I just thought maybe just maybe this girl has been true to me. So i stop walk out and deal with it. You know why because i actually care about her she has infested my mind its actually kinda stupid the way I am feeling. Now this girl is kind of a hoe and so am I normally but she just has me stupified if you will. And if she wants more than so do I but it is so hard to tell. I had my phone brake and havent talked to her in a few days so now I wait for a response or even something due to the fact that I have a new phone. So i brake out of one of my sexual fantasies for something i may eventually regret doing do to guilt.

Now I know it may just be me but I dont want to be "that guy" anymore I want to have someone that I truly care about and want to be with! And if thats is her than I will be more than ecstatic. If that is just me though then fuck what was I thinkin but if not and I do feel that there could possibly be a huge chance of this then that would be killer, do you know why? Well lemme tell you that it is because I am done with the old me. I want a new me and someone to bring home to the family. I have waited and dwelled on this for quite sometime now and have come to the final conclusion that I may finally be ready.

Ready for the realy jump? Well if so the question is....is SHE?!? Well she has given signs but none that prevail so i feel like I truly wait to find out the truth from her. God please help me in this one as I do sincerely need it.....

Out of Motivation!

At work they have recently started making a lot of changes for us, and on top of these changes they now want me to get qualified in shit that i really could give two shits less about. Well what doesn't help me even in the slightest is that I am going to be getting out of the Navy for sure, there is no longer any ifs ands or buts about this one.

We have these things called perform to serve and on these "evaluations" if you will there is an option that asks what you will be doing when your contract is up with the military and as I am sure you can guess there is the option for getting out. Well when I did my PTS I signed it saying that I am getting out of the military. In other words they caught me in a bad mood and now I no longer have any option to stay in or get out. Guess what, I knew this would be the case too. So now I am trying to get out a year early since the Navy is allowing people to do this for college since it is too full. I figure why should I waste time in the Navy for my last year of my contract? With this option I will now be able to get out in March 9th 2012 instead of 2013! Which if you havent figured out is great news! (for me anyways)

Now having all of that in mind lets jump back to the demotivated part. Where should I feel any kind of motivation to work hard for them or to get all these extra stupid ass qualifications that the Navy wants me to get when they are going to do absolutely nothing of use for me or my "career" that is none existant as it is! And on top of this what sucks even more ass is the fact that they want to get qualified and be able to do maritimes job (oceanography in a sense) where my job and orders are for Aviation! ITS BULL SHIT! How am i possibly going to feel any motivation what do I need to do? Obviously I cant tell them to fuck off (maybe in a lil over a year) but until then I guess I just have to suck it up.

So I guess for this next year I will now have to just suck it up and make sure I can get through a day. What kinda sucks though in that aspect of making it through a day is that there are only a couple things that really help me get through the days. Number one the thought of going home on leave in just a couple of weeks, and Number two is that i get to go hang out with my friends when I dont get stuck working in this god forsacken building! Oh well thats life right? Well if I'm feeling kinda down right now then next theres only one thing that can happen.....Things will start to look up. And hopefully sooner than later!

My Philosophy on life

Video games are some of the greatest things in my mind. I am a huge gamer, I love them so much and I have no idea what I would do without them sometimes! But lately I just havent had the biggest urge to play them all that much nor to even hop on the systems. I have a few new games that I have been wanting to play for a while! But instead lately I have been chillen with friends and living life instead. For a while I would just hide in my barracks room and play video games all the time, why you ask? Well the answer is cause I enjoyed it, didn't feel scared to get into trouble, but lately I havent been playing at all. And I am perfectly ok with this! I have been kickin it with friends and playing Beer Pong (greatest sport ever invented BTW) and hangin with my girl.

Pretty much what this comes down to is to enjoy your life, enjoy every minute of it cause you only get one chance to live it! And no one wants to look back and go shit i totally wasted the last 10 or however many years of my life because I wanted to worry about stuff. Instead you should take up on my life philosophy! Live life fast and Hard dont sit back and miss out on it cause there is just way to much that you could do in it! I would rather be poor and happy with friends and content on life any day than to be rich and alone or the only friends are because you have money. Now I do know that is not the case for everyone who is rich but still you get the picture.

There was a wise man who once said: "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."

And I bet you can guess what comes next. He is completely right, you should cause if you were to miss it, your really gonna hate life. Instead enjoy it don't let small things that can be quickly fixed or that you can get over keep you down.

I have this idea that I have decided that I want for my funeral. You know how all funerals are depressing and down? Well instead of that for mine, I want it to be a Kegger! I want it to be one hell of a party! Why you ask? Well because I dont want everyone to be down and sad that I am dead and have moved on, instead I want everyone to celebrate my life. Look back at my life and go damn that guy had one hell of a life....He actually did it all!

This is where I sign off, I just hope that you enjoyed the small amount of my philosophy that I have on life!

Dating and Relationships

Now a days it seems that people get to caught up on dating. Well in the past year or so I have come to the realization that there is absolutely no need for trying. What you need to do is just let it happen, and things will come naturally! Don't try to be an ass to her, don't try and impress her, don't wait to text or call her. Just be yourself at all times. Why you ask? Well that's the kicker, If he/she doesn't like you for you and who you are then she clearly is not worth your time. If they think your too clingy because you like to hold hands and kiss and text to much then screw it, they clearly are not meant for you.

If when they are sick and you have just met or started dating or whatever and you offer to come take care of them, make them soup and what not then why is that to much to soon? It's just a genuinely nice offer because you don't want to see them sick! Why do people look to much into things like that?

I think the world has now gotten way to caught up on the fact that you must be fake, an ass, hard to get, or whatever you want to call it these days. I've finally figured out that that is just not necessary, instead you just need to be yourself! No matter who yourself is just be it, because either way down the road they will find out the real you so why hide it in the beginning? Let them like you for you! Not someone that you are not!

Now in my last post i mentioned someone that I was really into and couldn't have. Well I did do what was necessary and I also met someone else. Instead of doing things that I shouldn't of like hiding who I am, I have been honest and straight forward with her from the beginning on who I am and what I am about. Things have been going great too. Hopefully this will continue, also thanks to this fact I've noticed how much easier it is to talk to her and be around her compared to making myself into something I am not!

You may take what I say with a grain of salt but thats ok cause I'm not looking to make you do anything, I am just trying to give advice on things that I have noticed over the past few years that makes a difference in dating. Why hide yourself, let people love you for you! Cause if they don't then it just is not worth it.

I hope this helps with your own little world domination, as it has mine. Besides don't we all know that if we are to dominate another world you must first dominate ones own! =D

Fucked up situation!

So recently I have met a girl that has almost the same personality as me. She makes me so happy, She even likes almost everything that I like, been through the same things that I like. So where is this fucked? Well she has a girl friend, and recently I finally decided that I needed to ask her on a date that I have been wanting to ask her on for quite sometime. Well guess what she said yes. I've known her now for about a month and cannot for the life of me get over her. She is so amazing, we are always happy when together and if we are ever down for whatever reason we cheer each other right up! Her girlfriend doesn't want her to date any guys and thought she was cheating on her with me even though at the time it was absolutely not true not even in the slightest! But when I asked her on the date she agreed to go with me. Well When we went on our date even though it wasn't perfect, the ice rink was closed the place we went to eat (the cheesecake factory) didn't look good, we still had an amazing time. We ended up just going to Qdoba and then to go see The Social Network. And needless to say we kissed during our date, she even fed me popcorn (which by the way was way too cute!) and at the end we watched the greatest cartoon series ever, Invader Zim. Well that same night her gf texted me and asked if I could help her pick out a ring so that she could propose to Brittany. I felt uncomfortable but agreed anyways so that nothing would seem suspicious. The two of them say they love each other but yet Brittany agreed to go on this date with me and then yet kiss me during said date. This confused the hell out of me afterwards.

Well today I went to help Anna pick out a ring for Brittany, I even picked the exact ring that I knew for sure that Brittany would love! In just a matter of a month I have come to know this girl to the tee! I think I may be falling for her and at this point there is nothing I can do. I put myself in this situation and I know this but yet I can't help but try to be on this slight amount of a pursuit of happiness that I have found for the first time in so many years. I have been single now for over at least a year and a half, except for small spurts of "relationships" where i just get everything thrown back in my face. And for the first time in a long ass time I think I may of found that true spot that I have been craving and wanting for so fucking long! Except she is now engaged with Anna.

Now here is the really odd part, what the fuck do I do? Do I let it go, or do I tell her my true feelings? Because from the very second that I met this girl I've been wanting to say I could marry her. I would be willing to give up the single life, just to know that I could have this one amazing girl next to my side for the rest of my life. Now I do know that it's still early even for her "engagement" and I say it like that cause they have only known each other for a few months but still I can't help but hold on to that little piece of hope.

But seriously did that kiss or kisses if you will not mean anything? Would you kiss someone that you don't have some kind of serious feelings for when your in love with someone? Now I know that I pretty much just need to talk to her about all of this but its so hard for me to actually do that. I have told her this tonight right after the engagement went down that I need to talk to her, but still I can't help but hold onto the little piece of hope that there may be something there and that I am not the only one! Especially cause after all this went down and the two of them were leaving she turned around a whispered to me that one we need to have our conversation and two that we will meet up later. Can you say subliminal messaging much?

So What it really comes down to is what does one do in such a situation? Especially when you feel so strongly about someone that you can't feel the need to let them go since it will leave such a gaping hole in (and I'm just spitballing here) the future that your really could, and i do mean for the first time in my life that I have ever felt like this!

If you have some advise on this situation please please please pass it my way as I could truly need it at this point!

Thank you readers for once again listening to my pointless rants and me just letting out some more bent up tention.